1954 Yesteryear Letter
Christi (Buss) Tuttle recently ran across a letter about her Uncle Darrel Buss, who is 94 years old and lives in Lakewood, Colorado. Her uncle was stationed in Frankfort, Germany, with the U. S. Army Crops V in 1954. He sent this typed letter home, and one of his cousins kept it through the years.
With Veterans Day approaching, the Sentinel thought it would interest our readers as we remember those who proudly served and are serving our country.
Headquarters V Crops APO 79 US Army SUBJECT: Notice of Return, Subject Soldier
“To next of kin, loved one, or anyone concerned: This document is issued in solemn warning on this 15th day of November 1954 to the friends, neighbors, relatives, and acquaintances of Cpl. Darrel E. Buss.
“Very soon, the abovenamed soldier will once again be in your midst, dehydrated, demoralized, and demobilized, to take his place once again as a human being with the feeling of freedom and just for all, to engage in life, liberty, and the somewhat belated pursuit of happiness. For making your joyous preparations to welcome him back into society, you must make a few allowances for the very crude environment that has been his home for the past fifteen months. In a word, he might be a little European, suffering from Germanitis, and he must be handled with extreme care.
“Show no alarm if he prepares to wear leather pants and carry a briefcase full of hot dogs, old bread, and beer. Don’t be shocked if he yells, ‘We its der Bahnhof, Schztzi?’ and drinks Steinhager from the goatskin flask. Refuse to ridicule him when he rides his bicycle down the middle of the street and yells at people driving cars.
Keep cool if he purrs like a tomcat at the slightest mention of alcohol, pours gravy on his dessert, and mixes peaches with Seagrams VO.
“Be tolerant if he prefers to sleep with his head on the table or takes his mattress off the bed and prefers to sleep on the floor. Don’t be upset if, when answering the telephone, he says ‘Wie Gehts’ instead of hello and ‘auf Wiedersehen’ instead of goodbye. In a relatively short time he can be taught to speak English again. Never ask him why the boy down the street was able to make a higher rank than he did, as this is liable to throw him into a violent fit. And do not make remarks such as how nice the uniforms look or why he doesn’t wear his.
He will go utterly insane if the world ‘re-enlistment’ is mentioned in his presence. But, above all, never ask why the neighbor’s son was stationed in the States for four full years, as this may lead to the most violent of events, possibly even murder.
“For the first few months after he is home, he will, from time to time, disappear for a day or two, or maybe even a few weeks; don’t ask him where he’s been or what he has done, or ask him not to do it again. The truth of the matter is, if he wanted you to know, he would tell you.
“For the first few months that he is home, e.i. until he is housebroken, be especially watchful when he is in the company of women, particularly ones that are beautiful.
His intentions are sincere, though dishonorable.
Keep in mind that beneath his tanned and rugged exterior, there beats a heart of gold, the only thing of value he has left. Treat him with kindness and tolerance and the occasional fifth, and you will be proud to rehabilitate that which is now the hollow shell of the once proud young man you knew.
“HE’S ON HIS WAY HOME!!!”
O. Mox Nix Col. USA “P. S. this letter is sent to you as a public service so that you may try and promote a better understanding by the citizens of the United States towards those poor woo begotten sons of America’s Foreign Legion.”
“As an added thought, and in the interest of civilian defense, it is recommended that you send no more mail in care of the postmaster of New York; put all women out of sight; get the kids off the streets; fill the icebox with beer; and get the civics out of the mothballs.”
